Moving

One of the best pieces of advice I was given when I started out on this journey was do not make any big decisions in the first year. I did make a few mistakes but nothing big. I got my affairs in order and dumped all my debt. Didnt realize I needed debt to keep my credit score up. doh! I kept to the status quo for the year. I was able to really look at my choices with a clearer head. I decided to continue with the life WE decided to live. I have the job I want, I live where he wanted and I am still working towards the things we had planned.

Now the odd thing about this is that I feel and sense memories of him doing this all with me. Like going to bed at night all alome in this new place I feel like he is here and I feel so safe. The sense of saftey was one thing I was concerned about in moving forward on our life project. I feel safe like I know he wont let anything bad happen to me. I keep him busy. A friend said they were confident that everything would work out for me. So far it has. I have a great angel watching over me and listening to my prayers. Just wish the one I want most hasnt happened et. But like Andy in Shashanke I will just keep writing mkre until they give me what I really truly want.

Only a few more days until the moving truck comes with all my belongings. This place does feel like home and I think its because he isnt far away. While checking out a new grocery store I passed by two women chatting when one asked, "Where is Adam?" I slowed my pace.. "Oh he is always around he just likes to hide sometimes." I smiled and was like oh Adam you cheeky bastard. A sign maybe for him to let me know that even though I cant see him he is here with me. I prefer he stop being stubborn and give me different signs but he was thicked headed here I doubt that has changed there.

I love him more and more each day. I miss him like crazy but I do feel our relationship evolving for the better. Maybe in the next life we can do it the conventional way. We were the odd balls in the bunch for sure.

So thats the happenings at this stage. 16 months and crawling forward. I have down days but I can now focus on the good instead of the bad. I am who I am because of him and that makes me happy.